Mohammad Al-Ubaydli’s blog

Bridget’s Pill

Posted in Politics by Dr Mohammad Al-Ubaydli on May 14, 2006

So the Catholic Church is finally considering permitting contraception, but only within a married couple where one of the partners is HIV positive. In a couple of centuries the Church will hopefully get round to apologising for having contributed to the deaths of millions of people from HIV around the world with its ban on contraception, but in the meantime, I chanced upon another charming ditty from Christy Moore. It is called “Bridget’s Pill” but I cannot figure out the words to the chorus. The remaining words, however, are below:

Now Bridget O’Reilly was a fine strapping girl,
Her skin was like ivory her teeth were like pearls
All the boys chased her in vain ’till one day,
She went and got married to Barry O’Shay.

[chorus]

And after nine months, to their pride and joy,
Along came a baby, a fine strapping boy,
After three years they’d two boys and a girl,
And to clothe them and feed them made Bridgette’s heard whirl.

[chorus]

So she went to the priest, in great desperation,
Becuase of this process of constant gestation,
Say father this business is making me ill,
Would it be a sin if I went on the pill?

[chorus]

Well the priest heard her story, and when he had heard it,
To higher authority perlplexed he reverted,
All the bishops they we baffled, the cardinals too,
No one could tell Bridgette of what she should do.

[chorus]

Two years they debated the holy profundity,
Of what should be done about Bridgette’s fecundity,
But by now her family amounted to five,
She scarcely was able to keep them alive.

[chorus]

Well they gave due attention to points theological,
To points philosophic and physiological,
Till in desperation the Pope said O sod,
There’s only one thing to do I’ll have to ask God.

[chorus]

So he sends him a letter in the three penny post,
And painful not paid addressed ‘Holy Ghost’,
Sayin’ send me your answer in double quick time,
You can get me at home just ring Vat’ 69.

[chorus]

Oh well the answer it came and the Pope he announced it,
Oral contraception he strongly denounced it,
Unethical means to prevent procreation,
Were banned under pains of eternal damnation.

[chorus]

And now the church is in ferment and great trepidation,
As such thoughts they might spread to the whole congregation,
They recorded an LP to prevent the schism,
‘tween the Pope and the hierarchy called I got rythm.

[chorus]

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